When buying a wedding shower gift and cannot go to the wedding do you still have to buy a gift?

Yes, if your child plays with the child having the birthday or goes to school with them. You could get a gift, card and take your child over to let them hand it to them at an earlier date.

Yes, if the child is a relative or the child of a friend that you are close to. If it's just a co-workers child or a child of someone you don't know well, no.