What if a 14 yr old does not want to live with the exstepmom because dad is in jail?

I assume the judge put you there since all these cases have to go through them and she now have custody, A minor can have requests on where to live but it is the judge deciding. If another relative want to take care of you they might consider change but I doubt they will put you in the foster care system if you have a good place to live in. A place also linked to your dad. You will not be allowed to be on your own at 14.