How can you cash your tax refund check without your husband being there?

If it's made out in your name only, you shouldn't need your husband there.

If it's made out to you jointly, it's probably something resembling fraud for you to cash it without his knowledge.

If you don't care if he knows or not, it's just a logistics problem, you can have him sign the back before you go to the bank and just deposit it into your joint account... I've done this (well, in reverse, since I'm the husband) for years, since it's difficult for my wife and I to both get to the bank during banking hours.