First ask yourself...Am I initiating hugs and kisses? If you are, what is his reaction? Many times spouses love each other very much, they have just got too comfortable or forgot how to show affection. Maybe they have been rejected in the past...you know how us women can be with our emotions, it is like a never ending roller coaster ride! Communication is the hardest, yet best solution. Just remember, never apologize for the truth...truth meaning your feelings. It is always best to put everything out on the table rather than beat around the corner so long as you respect each other.
Another suggestion:
You can bring up your dissatisfaction with the intimate/affectionate state of your relationship. It is easy to think that a partner knows what you want. But they do not always know that they are depriving you of something that is essential to your happiness. It is also easy to get into the mindset that they SHOULD know automatically. But the reality is that people grow up with different ways of life. Your husband's mother and father may not have shown much affection towards each other in front of him, or ever. His mother may have been a frigid and prudish woman. There may not have been a lot of affection in his family period. In this case, he may feel that the level of affection in your marriage is perfectly acceptable. The best way to find out if he loves you is to bring it to his attention that you need more affection, in Words and in actions, to be happy. It is important that you give him specific ways to satisfy your unmet needs. Instead of saying, "I need more affection," say, "To be happy, I need you to tell me you love me at least once every day, and I need you to kiss and hug me at least every other day." (Of course, the amount of affection you tell him you need must be tailored to your own needs) If you express very clearly to him your needs, you can judge whether or not he loves you by how much effort he puts into meeting your needs. A good husband, when given easily done, specific guidelines to making their wife happier, will at least exert SOME effort to achieving the goal. A really great book to work through that would help in a situation such as this is "Getting the Love You Want", by Dr. Harville Hendrix.
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