Who was the apostle who stayed with Mary by the cross?

AnswerThe synoptic gospels say that no one of Jesus'acquaintance was at the crucifixion, and that Mary and others watched from afar off. Since no one of Jesus' acquaintance was at the crucifixion, neither Thomas nor Mary could have been.

On the other hand, John's Gospel says that Mary and the 'disciple whom Jesus loved' were at the foot of the cross when Jesus was crucified. We do not know who the disciple was, but the second-century Church Fathers believed him to be the apostle John, a tradition that has followed ever since. The 'disciple whom Jesus loved' is in any case unlikely to be Thomas, because Elaine Pagels detects a thread of anti-Thomas rhetoric throughout John's Gospel, making it unlikely that the author would use this phrase when speaking of Thomas.

So, in John's Gospel, Mary was at the crucifixion with an unnamed disciple who is most unlikely to have been Thomas.