How do you know if your absent-mindedly neglecting your child?

Usually when you have to think quite hard to summon details you should know.

Details like when their birthday is or what they like, who their closest friends our perhaps. It depends a little on how old they are though, I mean if they're a teenager they're likely to want a sense of freedom that they'll get from hiding harmless information from you like a girl/boyfriend etc. However whatever age they are, asking this question might well mean there's some truth behind your worries.

say it's coming up to their birthday and you're wondering what to get them because you actually don't know, then you might be paying too little attention to your little one's life. Do you know, say, their favourite food? Do you spend time with your child asking about their day as if you genuinely want to know (because you should)? Do you ask about how they are? Do you 'play'? Does your child feel they can trust you to be there for them and remember things they tell you?

Sometimes just your body language and way of speaking may give off the impression that you're not really in the moment, or it may convince the child that you don't actually care about them because they're always met with your deadpan manner.

My dad had to frequently be reminded what school year I was in, he very almost forgot my birthday quite a few years in a row, had no idea what to get me for Christmas and birthdays so always gave me a small sum of money, and was never around in the morning only to come home when I was fast asleep in bed at night. Now I'm older (and very close to leaving the house), he sort of does his thing and I do my own thing, we live under the same roof but have a professional colleague-style relationship.

I get on with my father but I don't really feel like I know him at all, I would hate to see this happen to another family.