Can an insurance company deny auto insurance to a wife on her own car if her husbands license is suspended?

Yes, by law you must list all household members. At this point they are either included in the policy or excluded. It sounds like your with a standard company that wants absolutely nothing to do with your risk. Look for somebody that offers non-standard insurance policys, at this point you can either decide to include him in the policy or exclude him. As long as his license is not permanently revoked you can include him on the policy.