If you want the insurance company to total your wrecked car can you negotiate this?

Not really. Although things from vary from one state to another, usually they will repair the car if the damage value is 70% or less of the car's current book value. I've never heard of anyone doing this so I'm not sure if it's possible, but you COULD call the insurance company and tell them you're willing to settle for a check directly to you for less than the damage estimate. The company will probably agree as ALL insurance companies want to settle for as little as possible, but state laws may prohibit that because once a car is give a totaled or salvaged title it's reported to the state. To answer the question most of the time if they choose to repair it you have to side with that option most of the time, if you feel otherwise, consult your local auto accident attorney.