Do you need to go through your insurance company if the other driver was at fault?

Without more specific information, it's difficult to answer all of your questions. But, here we go:

1. If the other carrier is "forcing" you to go through your own insurance, they must have some questions about liability in this accident. Or, perhaps, they haven't finished their liability investigation, and are suggesting you approach your own insurance to expedite your claim.

2. If you paid your premium one day late, I'm unclear as to why you'd have a lapse in coverage for an entire week. One, some carriers will cancel you outright (if late payments are the norm), but really, you should just show a lapse in coverage and then reinstatement the day you make payment. Insurance is like any other "product": If you pay for it, you should have it. Definitely something to clarify with your carrier and, if you have an agent, have the agent approach them for you.

3. If the other driver was definitely At Fault, I think you mistook what the other carrier said about pain and suffering. If you live in a no-fault state (which means your own car insurance has to pay your medical bills, regardless of fault), the other carrier may have just been telling you that they wouldn't owe your medical bills since you're supposed to carry no-fault coverage for those. However, they would owe for actual "pain and suffering," otherwise known as a bodily injury claim, if their driver was at-fault for this loss and if you meet your state's requirements for bodily injury (usually these have to do with the amount of treatment or type of injury). Unfortunately, if you live in a no-fault state, and if your insurance had lapsed during this accident, any bodily injury settlement you reach with the other carrier will have a lien placed against it for your medical bills. This would be true even if you have health insurance that's paying for your injuries, because they would know your injuries were from an auto accident. This doesn't necessarily mean you wouldn't get any of the settlement, but it would be lessened by your medical bills. Note: If you're wondering whether you live in a no-fault state or not, you can check your insurance card. You should see a coverage called "PIP" or "Personal Injury Protection" listed on the card.

4. It sounds like you're upside down on your loan. Unfortunately, this is a tough situation to be in when you're vehicle is totaled. Insurance companies owe only the actual-cash-value of your vehicle, not the loan balance. This is very common, so don't feel alone -- a lot of people get their cars totaled and then have to roll the remainder of their loans after settlement into a new car loan. Of course, if you then total your new car, you're right back where you started, or worse. So, what can you do? If the other carrier agrees to pay for your damages, review their numbers very carefully. What system did they use to come up with your vehicle's actual-cash-value? Did they get the mileage right? Are all the options in your car on their valuation? How did they rate the condition of your car (watch for a rating of "average private" across the board -- it's a dead giveaway that they didn't seriously consider the condition of your vehicle). If you've had any major refurbishments on your car -- new brakes, rebuilt engine, new transmission, etc. -- make sure they know about them. Last but not least, don't waste your time looking up the Kelly Blue Book or NADA values of your car. Most insurance companies won't consider them. Instead, they want to know the market value of the car, which you can help determine by looking at classified ads for vehicles similar to yours.

Normally I wouldn't suggest this, but depending on the severity of your injuries, you might consider consulting an attorney. The world is full of lawyers willing to work on a contingency basis, which means they don't get paid unless they "win." Usually, "winning" means they settle with the other carrier; these things don't normally go to court. But be prepared for a long wait, particularly with your bodily injury claim.

Good luck!