The day after my husband passed i dreamed of him sitting on the couch and he told me not to worry what people say do what you want He was sitting and reading the paper?

That's nice. I think it is your unconscious mind telling you that, deep down inside, you know that he would have wanted you to be happy - even if this might mean doing something which some people might not like. But, it just might be your unconscious mind trying to rationalise a decision you have already made. There are times in life when we must weigh very carefully what we are going to do, especially when we know that someone else will be offended by our actions. This is not to say don't do it, just think very carefully before you do - and be ready to explain yourself to those who might b offended. If your reasons for your actions are good and valid then they may understand, and even eventually accept your decision. If they don't, and you are sure you are doing the right thing then you might have to leave these people to their own opinions - we cannot please everyone in life.