How do you write a funny speech for school captain?

My school caption made his final speech and the best part was "On the first day, I entered this school a only child and now end of my journey I will walk out of here with over 1.400 brothers and sisters. All hell Im going to cry, more then I cry when the hot food at the canteen has run out. This is because I will miss every single one of you guys and I will remember you forever." every teacher was crying.